Do You Suffer from Busyness Sickness?

“Busyness is an illness of the spirit.” ~ Eugene Peterson

Over the last few weeks, we’ve explored several practical ways to become more intentional with our time. From organizing our days and creating better routines to focusing our attention, letting go of multitasking, and giving ourselves permission to take breaks.

But before we wrap up this series next week, I want to go a little deeper and ask an important question:

Why do so many of us feel the need to be doing something all the time?

Because all that multitasking, skipping breaks, overbooking, rushing, and constantly trying to squeeze more into our days might just be signs of a larger pattern.

We have become really good at being busy.

Sometimes so good that when we finally get caught up, instead of enjoying the breathing room we’ve created, we immediately find something else to fill it. We add another project, make another commitment, check another thing off the list, or simply find another way to stay in motion.

I’ve jokingly called this busyness sickness for years. But while it’s obviously not an actual illness, the pattern behind it is very real. We’ve become so accustomed to doing, accomplishing, rushing, and staying connected that slowing down can actually feel uncomfortable.

And for some people, busyness has become much more than a full schedule. It’s become part of how they measure their value.

When Busy Becomes a Badge of Honor

Think about how often someone asks, “How are you?” and the response is, “Fine... busy!”

I've said it too. And sometimes there's almost an unspoken pride attached to it.

A full calendar can make us feel important. Being needed can make us feel valuable. A long To-Do List can make us feel productive. And accomplishing one thing after another can give us a temporary sense that we're succeeding.

There's nothing wrong with being productive or having a full life. I love accomplishing things! And there are certainly seasons when life is legitimately very busy.

The problem begins when we start using busyness as evidence of our worth.

If being productive makes you feel valuable, what happens when you aren't producing? If being needed makes you feel important, what happens when no one needs you? If accomplishing more helps you feel like you're enough, how much will you have to accomplish before you finally believe you are?

That's where busyness can become an exhausting cycle.

You do more to feel like you're enough. But there's always more that could be done, so you never quite arrive at enough.

How Busy Are You?

Rather than simply looking at how many things are on your calendar, I want you to think about how busyness shows up in your life.

Give yourself one point for each statement that feels true for you most of the time:

• I regularly overbook or overcommit myself. 
• I frequently feel like I'm rushing from one thing to the next. 
• I have difficulty saying no, even when I don't really have the time or energy to say yes. 
• I feel guilty, lazy, or unproductive when I'm resting. 
• I automatically reach for my phone whenever I have a few unoccupied minutes. 
• I frequently try to do multiple things at once because I feel like there's too much to do. 
• I have a hard time being fully present because I'm already thinking about what's next. 
• I often sacrifice sleep, exercise, meals, or other self-care because I'm “too busy.” 
• I regularly add something new as soon as an opening appears on my calendar. 
• I become impatient when something or someone slows me down. 
• I continually tell myself, “I'll slow down after I get through this week, project, or season.” 
• Even when I'm not doing something, my mind is usually racing through everything I need to do. 

Your score: ______

There's obviously no scientific diagnosis attached to your score. This is simply an awareness exercise. But if you checked quite a few of those boxes, I'd encourage you to get curious about your relationship with busyness.

Which one stood out most?

And perhaps more importantly, what do you think is driving it?

What's Beneath Your Need to Stay Busy?

For some people, it's people pleasing. You want to be helpful. You don't want to disappoint anyone. You hate saying no. So, you continue adding things to your life even when you know you don't have the time or energy for them.

For others, it may come from what they learned growing up. Maybe hard work was highly valued in your family, which can certainly be a wonderful virtue but somewhere along the way, working hard became always working. Rest started to feel lazy. And always working became something to be proud of, while slowing down somehow felt wrong.

Then there's the need to prove yourself.

If there's a part of you that worries you aren't successful enough, accomplished enough, contributing enough, or simply enough, staying busy gives you a way to continually prove your value.

And the tricky part is that busyness can reward you for it.

People may praise how much you accomplish. They may tell you they don't know how you do it all. You become the dependable one, the productive one, the person everyone can count on.

Those compliments feel good.

Until maintaining that identity starts costing you your energy, health, relationships, joy, or peace.

Busyness can also be a form of avoidance. If you keep moving fast enough, then you don't have much time to sit quietly with an uncomfortable emotion, make a difficult decision, have a hard conversation, or take a risk on something you might fail at.

Sometimes being busy is easier than being still.

That's why simply buying a better planner isn't always the answer.

Productivity and Busyness Are Not the Same Thing

This distinction is especially important in a series about using our time well.

Being busy does not necessarily mean you're being productive. And being productive does not necessarily mean you're spending your time on what matters.

You can answer emails, attend meetings, run errands, respond to everyone else's requests, check ten things off your to-do list, and fall into bed exhausted – all without making meaningful progress on something important to you.

That's busy activity. Productivity is different.

Productivity is intentionally directing your time, attention, and energy toward what matters. Sometimes that means accomplishing a lot. Other times it means doing fewer things better.

And sometimes using your time well means not producing anything at all.

It means resting. Taking care of your body. Sitting on the porch with your spouse. Calling your mom. Playing with your kids or grandkids. Going for a walk without listening to anything. Having an afternoon with absolutely nothing scheduled.

Those things may never appear on a traditional productivity report.

But they can still be an incredibly valuable use of your life.

You Don't Have to Earn Your Right to Slow Down

This may be the hardest part for someone who has worn busyness as a badge of honor.

You don't have to finish everything before you're allowed to rest.

Because everything will never be finished.

There will always be another email, another task, another project, another load of laundry, another opportunity, and another person who could use something from you.

If you keep waiting until everything is done to slow down, you'll spend your entire life waiting.

So instead of asking yourself, how can I fit everything in? try asking a different question:

Why am I trying to fit everything in?

Pay attention to the answer.

Maybe you'll discover something on your calendar that really doesn't need to be there. Maybe you'll recognize an old belief about productivity and worth that no longer serves you. Or perhaps you'll notice that you've become so accustomed to rushing that you've forgotten what it feels like not to.

Whatever you discover, don't judge it. Use the awareness.

Because awareness gives you the opportunity to make a different choice.

Give Yourself Permission to Create Some Space

So here's my challenge for you this week: Don't automatically fill in the next opening in your calendar.

Leave a little white space and notice what happens.

Does it feel peaceful? Uncomfortable? Do you immediately think about what you should be doing? Do you reach for your phone? Do you feel guilty for “wasting time”?

Get curious about your response because it can tell you a lot.

And then ask yourself one final question:

If I didn't need to stay busy to feel productive, successful, valuable, or enough… what would I want to do with more of my time?

Maybe you'd give more of it to your health. Your family. A relationship. A dream. Creativity. Fun. Rest. Or simply enjoying the life you've worked so hard to create.

The goal isn't to have an empty calendar or stop being ambitious.

It's to stop confusing a full calendar with a full life.

Because there's a big difference between being busy and being meaningfully engaged in a life that matters to you.

Feeling too busy to read that book you have been eyeing for weeks? Find a Philosopher's Note on it with this Link.