Strive for Progress Not Perfection

"I am careful not to confuse excellence with perfection. Excellence, I can reach for - perfection is God's business."   ~ Michael J. Fox

I have a confession to make… (although if you've been in my community for any length of time, you probably already know this about me) I am a recovering perfectionist. Yep, I have been trapped in the claws of perfectionism a lot throughout my lifetime. I don’t really remember exactly when or how it started. But I certainly can remember many occasions when it held me back from peace, happiness, and even success in my life.

So, it’s not only easy for me to spot a fellow perfectionist, but when I do meet someone who is suffering with this debilitating issue, it breaks my heart. Because I know all too well the pain that perfectionism can cause.

What about you? Do you suffer from perfectionism? Is being a perfectionist keeping you from fulfilling your true potential and living your best life? If your answer is even a tiny bit of a yes, then I have good news for you because I want to share a simple shift that has helped me and many of my clients tremendously.

Start with this… Define out what “perfect” means to you. Then check that definition with an objective eye to determine if it is realistic or not. Although perfect might mean flawless in the dictionary, in your life, give yourself the grace to let it mean flawsome! In other words, still awesome even with flaws. 😊 Cause let’s face it, we all have them.

Now ask yourself how things might be different if you stopped striving for perfection and started striving for your own level of excellence? What if you focused on progress and not perfection? 

Making progress as you move towards your own level of excellence or as I like to call it, "being your best true you" or your best self - is attainable! Where being perfect rarely is. 

I've had many talks with my daughters about the unrealistic expectation of perfection. One in particular, used to really get tripped up by a need to be perfect. Even now, we sometimes have to remind her that we don't expect her to be perfect. As long as she's trying to do her best, it's enough. (Heck, I sometimes have to remind myself of this too!)  See I think we as a society have this unrealistic expectation that things need to be perfect - that we need to be perfect, or we aren’t enough. But just as success must be defined individually if you want to achieve true happiness, your own perfection is something that must be defined from within as well. 

Think about it, happiness, success, excellence and perfection are all subjective. My definitions and yours may be very different because we value different things. So striving for perfection is an elusive goal, unless you get clear on what it means to you. And when you do that, then you free yourself from other perceived expectations and your power expands to reach your own excellence. 

Let me give you a simple example... As I sit on my back patio writing this, it is a "perfect evening" to me. It's a warm fall evening, I'm looking out at the changing colors of the trees. A great fall meal is cooking in the kitchen, and I can smell it's yummy scent. I can hear the gentle melody of music and my dog is laying by my side as I write. It's the perfect evening - for "this" evening, and for me. You might not see it that way. You might think a perfect evening is a night on the town, drinking the best champagne and eating the finest foods. And guess what? On occasion, I might agree. See that's the thing - perfection is in the eye of the beholder. So it's not about being without a flaw or failure here or there. As a matter of fact, those little imperfections are what give us character, make us human and make us better. Don't strive for perfection - strive for progress. Which leads me back to working to be your best self. It's not about perfect. It's about effort. And when you bring that effort every single day to everything you do, that's when progress happens. And that's how you find your true inner greatness.

Don’t let perfectionism steal your peace or joy any longer. Don’t let it paralyze your actions and control your life. Instead, be imperfect, be brave, be bold. Strive for your own level of excellence. Strive to be your best true you – based on your own definition, not someone else’s. And when you make this simple shift, what I believe you’ll find is the perfect version of yourself and your life.

The holidays are coming... they are meant to bring joy and love but for some they bring stress, anxiety and sadness. If you're already starting to feel the pressure or are feeling a sense of sadness that you are struggling to shake off, know that you do not have to go it alone.

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