Masterful Mindsets

“Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls bloom.” ~ Marcel Proust

This week my daughters host their annual Friendsgiving celebration at our home!

I love listening to the hum of their voices talking and laughing. It’s been a little quiet around here this year as both girls and all their friends are away at college. So, I do love when they all come home. And although their friendships will change as they each start to go their own way; the ones who give consistent effort to stay connected will be able to pick up right where they left off every time they get together.

I think about the friends I have - acquaintances, colleagues, family, my spouse, my daughters’ friends’ parents, my workout friends, my long-distance friends, my closest friends, old friends, new friends, potential friends… and on and on. All different levels of friendship and yet all hold value and a place in my heart. Maybe you can relate, when you stop to think ...

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." ~Buddha

Relationships require effort. Anyone who tells you differently is misrepresenting the truth of relationships. Now I am not saying that they have to be difficult or hard. But they do require effort. Trust me, after 31 years of marriage (which we are celebrating today) we wouldn’t still be deeply in love with each other if we didn’t put effort into our relationship. Don't get me wrong, sometimes even we need a reminder. Life can get busy and overwhelming. And when that happens, it's easy to take your closest relationships for granted. But to keep any relationship alive and strong, it requires attention and effort. It requires kindness, love and affection.

Do a check right now before you read on… On a scale of 1-10, how much effort do you put into each of the relationships you value most? If the score you give yourself doesn’t match the value of the relationship, then I’d say it’s tim...

“Balance doesn’t exist but proportion and harmony do.” ~ Danielle LaPorte

Your work. Your relationships. Your inner life.  – David Whyte calls these “the three marriages”. Each of these three marriages are nonnegotiable. They cannot be balanced equally against each other. A little taken from this and a little given to that – to balance work with relationship and with the self means we only work harder in each marriage, while actually weakening each of them by separating them from one another. These fundamental components of our existence must work to support one another, not to vie for constant attention.

We frequently and unconsciously structure our lives so that our work, our spirit and our significant relationships are set against one another in a competition of importance. Someone or something is bound to lose in this equation. When you deny one of the fundamental values of your life the attention it’s asking you for, your whole life is affected. I see it all the time, someo...

"The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is the energy you bring to every moment." ~ unknown

Throughout this month we’ve been exploring different and perhaps less widely recognized, aspects of energy. Beginning with how releasing negative emotions can increase positive energy. Then we looked at the influence your energetic presence has on other people and on to the power of focused energy. Finally, last week I shared some of the sneaky bad habits that drain your energy.  

Now I want to give you a bonus, as we wrap up this month-long discussion on the power of energy and the pivotal role of energy in achieving high performance and success. Because as I mentioned at the beginning of this series, there are different types of energy that impact our lives, both individually and collectively. And in our fast-paced, demanding world, being able to maintain optimal levels of physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual energy is not just a luxury; it's an absolute necessity.

So, ...

“Relationships are like plants… Nurture them, they grow. Ignore them… they wilt away.” ~ Namrata Britto

Valentine’s Day is coming up next week, but keeping the love in your relationships strong, is a daily affair not just a one day event. So, if you haven’t expressed love to your significant other lately, or (even if you aren’t in a relationship) at least told the people that matter most to you how much you appreciate them… read on because this is important if you want to make sure your relationships aren't just surviving but that they are actually thriving!!

Relationships require effort. It doesn’t have to be difficult but it is essential. If you don’t nurture your relationships, they will suffer. Some can withstand the test of time (a rough patch here or there) but without nurturing, relationships will not grow and may not be strong enough to survive, let alone thrive. So rather than waiting to express your love during one token holiday, practice love and appreciation of those ...

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”  – Lucille Ball

Most of the people I work with are heart-centered, service-oriented, high-performers and yet, extremely hard on themselves. They are quick to focus on the love they have in relationships with others but equally as easily, overlook the relationship they have with themselves. Sound familiar?

The problem is... if you're someone who wants to be your best and give the best of yourself to others, you’ve got to have a loving relationship with yourself or you will always hit a limit that you can’t get past. 

As the saying goes: If you want to say "I love you", you must start with "I".

One of the many areas I coach people on is having the confidence and courage to take risks and strive for success in all areas of their lives. And the thing I know for sure, is anytime you are pushing out of your comfort zone, you will struggle with fear and doubt...

“It is not joy that makes us grateful; it is gratitude that makes us joyful.” ~David Steindl-Rast

Last week I gave you an interesting statistic on the power of gratitude… I shared that people who have a gratitude practice of writing down at least 5 things they are grateful for once a week can boost their happiness by as much as 25% in as little as 10 weeks. Which is a compelling statistic in and of itself. But today I want to share a few more facts with you about the power of gratitude. (Just in case a 25% increase in happiness isn’t enough to convince you that it’s worth it to have a gratitude practice.) 😉  

So Robert Emmons, who is one of the world’s leading researchers on the science of gratitude along with his colleague Mike McCollough were the first researchers to discover the profound benefits of gratitude through their studies.

What they found was that people who regularly cultivate gratitude “experience a multitude of psychological, physical, interpersonal, and spiritual...