Masterful Mindsets

 “The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.” ~John Pierpont Morgan

How often do you find yourself dancing with indecisiveness about what your next steps or actions will be in your life? I will admit there have been times when I’ve felt stuck and hesitant to take a step forward into something new. The fear of uncertainty and failure can be paralyzing if you aren’t careful. But sometimes all it takes to move forward is the decision that you are ready to take that first step and the certainty of knowing that no matter where it takes you, you’re going to be alright.

I remember as a little girl growing up, my grandparents used to say, "Watch out for that first step. It's a doozy.", which I always thought was funny. But I was not lost on the fact that what they were actually saying, was to be careful because that first step could be tricky, difficult or even dangerous. And if you weren't careful, you could trip and fall. It was ...

"When life seems hard, the courageous do not lie down and accept defeat; instead, they are all the more determined to struggle for a better future."   ~Queen Elizabeth II 

A lot can be learned about a person's character if you observe them during difficult times. They will show you their victim side or their victor side. They will show you their pessimism or their optimism. Their kindness or their bitterness... And as the quote says, those who are courageous will show that they are strong and courageous, in their actions and determination. While all too often, those who are afraid of difficulty or failure will never take the risk to move forward. 

Now that doesn't mean that those who are strong and courageous never fail. Quite the contrary - what it means is that they aren't afraid of failure because they don't see it as defeat. They see it as an opportunity to learn and try again. And most importantly, they know that their failures do not define them but rather, it's how they sh...

" - it's possible." ~ Les Brown

Next week my youngest daughter will graduate from high school, and as I'm sure many of you know embarking on a new journey can be a fearful experience. I decided that this week, I wanted to set the stage for the words of Les Brown to speak to anyone experiencing the closing of one chapter and beginning of another. So I’m giving up my writing space and time with you this week to Les Brown, because what he says, I could not say any better myself.

Although you may have heard or read this before, I can promise you, it's worth the read again. Therefore, as a little something different, below is the rest of the speech that inspired me to use today's quote. It’s simple really… “ - it’s possible” speaks volumes to me. Often shouting out, above the noise and chatter of fear, especially when I’m embarking on a journey to make a dream a reality. Loud and clear. It's possible! And guess what, your dreams are possible too. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

"Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action."  ~ Walter Anderson

I’m sure you can recall times in your own life when you many have been anxious or worried about something. And that anxiety might have caused some stress, irritability or general restlessness. Perhaps even a physical response like sleeplessness, a headache or an upset stomach. It happened to me just recently...

I was working on a big project that was taking me longer than I’d have liked because I was catching myself agonizing over small parts and not moving the project forward. I finally had to have a serious talk with myself and take some direct actions to get it finished. Of course, then, the anxiety was gone. Just that quick and truly, just that easy. But what about when anxiety persists? Increased or continual anxiety can be a serious issue. What starts out as misdirected energy can turn into insomnia, acid reflux, headaches, depression or even full out panic attacks. Anxiety and worry can weaken your immune...

“Only you hold the key to unlock your true potential.” ~MW

Several years ago, I wrote an article that was inspired by a late-night TV commercial and my husband being the smart-aleck that he is. 😉

Then a few months ago, I ran across this article while I was looking for inspiration again… The interesting thing is, this time when I read what I’d written, it nudged me to heed my own advice. Below is the original article. Have a quick read and then at the bottom, I’ll explain why this article coming across my desk recently was exactly the nudge I needed right now.

Do you have a flavor lock lid keeping all your potential inside?

I was watching late night TV the other night and wondering what I should write this month’s article about. Looking for inspiration, I asked my husband if he had any ideas. It just so happened, at that moment, there was a commercial for coffee that had a flavor lock lid to keep all the freshness in. So my loving husband, being the helper he is, said, “Why don...

“Never let a stumble in the road be the end of your journey.” – unknown

Will you be part of the majority that gives up on your resolutions or the minority that succeeds? I want you to succeed! Which is why these last couple weeks, I’ve given you some tips to succeed at making your New Year’s Resolutions a reality this year.

But let’s face it, even though it sounds simple in theory, it can be tough because there are so many things that can trip you up and keep you from staying the course. That point is proven when you consider that statistics show less than 10% of the people who set resolutions actually keep them.

So today, I want to conquer some of the most common pitfalls that can sabotage your success and keep you from sticking with your resolutions.

1. Too Many Resolutions – Trying to make too many changes all at once is a recipe for disaster. You are more prone to get overwhelmed and give up. Pick the one transformation that is most important to you and start there. If you s
...

“I can’t tell you the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone.”  – Ed Sheeran

Do you often find yourself doing everything for others at the expense of yourself? Or perhaps you have a difficult time saying no to other people’s demands or requests. So much so that you'd rather twist yourself into a pretzel than say no to them. And then there's the worry and anxiety which stems from a fear about what others will think or if they'll be happy with you. If you can relate, then it could be that you suffer from the disease to please...

I have worked with many clients throughout the years who admittedly knew that they were people pleasers. It's often what draws them to working with a coach. They feel burnt out and trapped into what I like to call, “Superwoman Syndrome”. (Note: Not all who suffer from Superwoman Syndrome are People Pleasers, but all People Pleasers also suffer from Superwoman Syndrome - more on that next week.)

Anyway, I was doing a little rese...

“Your best is going to change from moment to moment, it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstances, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.”  ~ Don Miguel Ruiz

So many people put pressure on themselves to be perfect and what I find interesting about that, is the pressure of “perfect”, usually gets in the way of actually being your best. Maybe you can relate… Do you put pressure on yourself to be perfect or do you accept that your best is enough and simply make it a point to be your best true you each day?

This is where the fourth agreement, Always Do Your Best, from Don Miguel Ruiz’s book, The Four Agreements, comes in. It really could be the easiest of all the agreements and yet so many people struggle with it. But it's not because they don't want to be their best, or they aren’t capable of doing their best. But rather, it's usually a result of not believing that their best is good enough. So instead ...

“The freedom to be yourself is a gift only you can give yourself. But once you do, no one can take it away.” – Doe Zantamata

“The truth will set you free” ~ John 8:32

As we come to the end of this series on the lies that worry tells us, it’s important to note that worry and fear are two different things. Sometimes fear creates worry and sometimes, worry can create fear. For example, the fear of the unknown can cause us to worry about the future. And worrying about the future can stoke the fire of fear, making it grow out of control and keeping us from ever stepping forward into the future we want to create.

I could go on and on about the differences between worry and fear but that's a much bigger topic, so I won’t get into that today. For now, just keep in mind that there will always be things we fear. And that’s okay. True fear isn’t always within our control, and it is sometimes necessary in order to keep us safe. But worry is within our control and it rarely, if ever serves a purpose. So, if we don’t want our fear to paralyze us and hold us back, then it is to our benefit to keep worry quiet or bett...