Masterful Mindsets

“The eyes are the windows to your soul.” - William Shakespeare

It has been said that the eyes are the window to your soul. Yet unfortunately, so many people wear masks to hide who they are that no one ever gets to see their true beautiful soul. And sadly, not only does no one else get to know the real them, but they often go through life wondering who they themselves are because they have lost touch with their own selves from spending so much of their lives wearing a mask and pretending to be someone they are not.

Has this ever been you? What mask are you wearing?

You may have begun wearing a mask for protection but who are you really protecting yourself from - the world around you or your own self? Are you trying to hide who you are or how you feel? Maybe you feel like you’re not enough as you are or won’t be accepted as you are. That can be tough, and I understand that sometimes it really does feel safer to put on a mask and pretend to be something you are not. But life was no...

“Always be yourself, unless you can be a ninja, then always be a ninja.” ~unknown

As I was preparing to write this week’s blog post, I was feeling a bit stuck for an idea. So, I did what I sometimes do when stuck, and that is read old articles I’ve written in order to find a subject for inspiration. (I could honestly fill a book with all I’ve written in the last 18+ years of delivering weekly articles/blog posts to you.) In addition to ideas for topics, sometimes it’s just fun to read through them again because many include stories of what was going on in my life at the time. Ummm… yes, I realize this is possibly border lining on procrastination because I’m stuck. But that’s not the point of today’s post. LOL - Instead, what I want to tell you about is a post I wrote clear back in 2009. (And yes, this one involved a personal example.)

See, since it’s October and Halloween is just around the corner, I was thinking about writing something on the topic of fear. But I couldn’t quite ...

“Life is a matter of choices, and every choice you make makes you.”  ~John C. Maxwell

Have you seen those quick quizzes on social media? (If you follow me on Instagram, you’ve probably seen them on my story periodically.) They list a bunch of things and then ask you if you’d choose this or that. It’s usually something fun and cute like “Coffee or Tea”, “Mountains or Beach” – but what if there was a this or that quiz that required you to dig a little deeper for the answers?

Over the last few weeks, I’ve been asking you to choose between Courage or Comfort, Hope or Fear, and Stuck or Striving. How’s that for a this or that quiz? When you really think about the choices you are making in your life, do you like what you are choosing? I get it, it’s not as fun as choosing “Cake or Pie” but its choices like these that can truly transform your life.

So, let me ask you, what choices have you been making lately that are dictating the outcomes of your life? And maybe more importantly, are ...

“Hope and fear cannot occupy the same space at the same time. Invite one to stay.” ~ Maya Angelou

In my last Masterful Mindset, I wrote about choosing courage over comfort. So now, I want to focus on another choice we have. This is the choice between hope and fear. So before you read on, ask yourself, if hope or fear is dictating the path you’re taking to your future? Which one do you want guiding you into the next chapter of your life?

With each passing year, both of my daughters consistently and joyfully embark on new chapters in their lives. (This year, my oldest will be graduating college and my youngest will be leaving for college) at I want for them but at the same time, letting them go… not so easy.

I have such great hope for their futures. And yet, if I’m not careful, I can easily find myself overcome with fear about their futures too. The uncertainty, the risks, the fact that I truly cannot be there to protect them every step of the way nor am I in control of everything...

“Comfort is the enemy of progress.” ~ PT Barnum

I was in a yoga class recently and the instructor asked us to ponder the question, “Will you choose courage or comfort today?” She left it open ended… and since it was the beginning of the class, it would be easy to assume she was just talking about our physical effort for the class. But of course, you know me… I took it much farther than that. Because the truth is, you could literally ask that question for every instance, decision or action in your life.

As class continued, my thoughts went inward, and I had an aha moment that led to a shift for me, which reignited my desire and passion for progress. So, I wanted to share it with you, just in case you need a little nudge to push you out of your comfort zone too.   

Now first, let me just say that being comfortable isn’t always a bad thing. We as humans are usually striving for comfort in some way. But it’s when being comfortable gets uncomfortable that we must recognize we are stu...

“Being able to selectively forget about the things in your life that don’t serve you might just be the most freeing feeling in the world.”

I was recently coaching a client through a session on defining her ideal identity and it reminded me of an old show I watched years ago. It was about a woman who had amnesia and was trying to figure out who she really was. As she began to rediscover herself, what she found was that she didn’t really like who she had been. So, she decided that if she was going to have to relearn who she was, she might as well learn to be who she really wanted to be. She chose to redefine herself, create new beliefs and make some changes that of course, lead to her becoming a better, happier and more successful person then she had ever been.    

I still remember thinking, as I sat there watching the show, that in a way she was kind of lucky. Don’t get me wrong, there would be many downfalls to having amnesia, like not knowing any of your friends or family. But woul...

“Do something every day that scares you.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

When was the last time you tried something new for the first time? I posed this question to my Tuff Chicks Group recently because I think it is important to try new things, be open to change, challenge yourself and of course, as the featured quote says, do something that scares you!  

I was speaking with my own coach recently (Yes, coaches have coaches – the process works! So why wouldn’t we?!?!) and was asked to rank how much I feel I challenge myself and to name something I’ve done lately that has pushed me out of my comfort zone. It was kind of interesting because at first I was being really hard on myself and then I began to think of several occasions recently when I’d stepped out of my comfort zone to take a risk, learn something new and challenge myself big time with a huge project. Doing the exercise made me feel really proud, because stepping out of my comfort zone is something that I try to challenge myself to...

“The secret of happiness is freedom... The secret of freedom is courage.” - Thucydides

Independence Day is one of the greatest American holidays, both for what we celebrate and how we celebrate it. I mean, who doesn't love a good barbecue, a festive parade and spectacular fireworks? But as our whole world knows, freedom is not something to be taken for granted. A few years ago COVID quickly taught us that lesson. And yet, I still encounter people who readily give their freedom away by being trapped within the walls of their own beliefs and fears.

What about you? Are you trapped by your own fears and limiting beliefs, or do you feel truly free to live your best life? I know one thing; our forefathers certainly didn't fight for our freedom so that we could be imprisoned by our own limitations. So do you have the courage to set yourself free?

Take some time this week and into the coming holiday weekend to reflect on why we celebrate. There are some in this world who only wish they ...

 “The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.” ~John Pierpont Morgan

How often do you find yourself dancing with indecisiveness about what your next steps or actions will be in your life? I will admit there have been times when I’ve felt stuck and hesitant to take a step forward into something new. The fear of uncertainty and failure can be paralyzing if you aren’t careful. But sometimes all it takes to move forward is the decision that you are ready to take that first step and the certainty of knowing that no matter where it takes you, you’re going to be alright.

I remember as a little girl growing up, my grandparents used to say, "Watch out for that first step. It's a doozy.", which I always thought was funny. But I was not lost on the fact that what they were actually saying, was to be careful because that first step could be tricky, difficult or even dangerous. And if you weren't careful, you could trip and fall. It was ...

"When life seems hard, the courageous do not lie down and accept defeat; instead, they are all the more determined to struggle for a better future."   ~Queen Elizabeth II 

A lot can be learned about a person's character if you observe them during difficult times. They will show you their victim side or their victor side. They will show you their pessimism or their optimism. Their kindness or their bitterness... And as the quote says, those who are courageous will show that they are strong and courageous, in their actions and determination. While all too often, those who are afraid of difficulty or failure will never take the risk to move forward. 

Now that doesn't mean that those who are strong and courageous never fail. Quite the contrary - what it means is that they aren't afraid of failure because they don't see it as defeat. They see it as an opportunity to learn and try again. And most importantly, they know that their failures do not define them but rather, it's how they sh...