Masterful Mindsets

“Being able to selectively forget about the things in your life that don’t serve you might just be the most freeing feeling in the world.”

I was recently coaching a client through a session on defining her ideal identity and it reminded me of an old show I watched years ago. It was about a woman who had amnesia and was trying to figure out who she really was. As she began to rediscover herself, what she found was that she didn’t really like who she had been. So, she decided that if she was going to have to relearn who she was, she might as well learn to be who she really wanted to be. She chose to redefine herself, create new beliefs and make some changes that of course, lead to her becoming a better, happier and more successful person then she had ever been.    

I still remember thinking, as I sat there watching the show, that in a way she was kind of lucky. Don’t get me wrong, there would be many downfalls to having amnesia, like not knowing any of your friends or family. But woul...

" - it's possible." ~ Les Brown

Next week my youngest daughter will graduate from high school, and as I'm sure many of you know embarking on a new journey can be a fearful experience. I decided that this week, I wanted to set the stage for the words of Les Brown to speak to anyone experiencing the closing of one chapter and beginning of another. So I’m giving up my writing space and time with you this week to Les Brown, because what he says, I could not say any better myself.

Although you may have heard or read this before, I can promise you, it's worth the read again. Therefore, as a little something different, below is the rest of the speech that inspired me to use today's quote. It’s simple really… “ - it’s possible” speaks volumes to me. Often shouting out, above the noise and chatter of fear, especially when I’m embarking on a journey to make a dream a reality. Loud and clear. It's possible! And guess what, your dreams are possible too. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

"We need to accept that we won't always make the right decisions, that we'll screw up royally sometimes - understanding that failure is not the opposite of success, it's part of success."  ~Arianna Huffington 

I absolutely love this week's quote because it stands as a reminder to me that failure is not a bad thing. And instead, a necessary part of growth and success. This has been a hard lesson for me to learn. You see, I grew up with a well-meaning father what told me all my life, "You can't afford to make mistakes." Needless to say, it entrenched a huge fear of failure in me that at times would literally paralyze me from taking action - questioning my every move and staying in limbo for fear that the decisions or actions I might take, just might be a mistake!

Maybe you can relate in some way…

What are your deep-seated beliefs about failure? Perhaps you were programmed with a similar message when you were growing up that has kept you from taking huge leaps in your life. Do you ...

“Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other.”   ~ Abraham Lincoln

I had a woman schedule a strategy session with me last week who told me she was feeling like a real failure because she had “already blown it” for this year. See she had decided that this was going to be the year that she got her health back, cleared out the clutter in her house and stopped saying yes to everyone’s demands of her. Yet after just a couple weeks she had found herself back in the old patters of unhealthy eating, not even starting on the house and pleasing others by overcommitting herself.  

Here’s the thing… the one resolution she hadn’t made, was a resolution to succeed at the goals she’d set for herself no matter what. Why is this important? Well quite simply because changing old habits isn’t always easy. So, without the resolve to keep working at it, keep pushing yourself to recommit every day, it can be easier to just give up. And that is where she was...

“Our habits shape who we become and the results we create in the world.” ~ Lewis Howes

I’ve been writing all month about resolutions and how to create resolutions that work. But when it all boils down to it, keeping your resolutions is really about creating habits in your life that serve you to your highest potential and help you create the results you want.

Think about this…

We all have good and bad habits, right? When you think of habits, you might think of those that are easy to identify – such as good habits like brushing your teeth every day or bad habits like biting your nails. But have you ever thought about the fact that behaviors such as negative self-talk, procrastination, stress eating, hitting the snooze button, and even people pleasing are also habits? Likewise, things like scheduling and planning your day, being fully present with people, keeping a positive mindset or taking intentional breaks to improve your mental and physical energy throughout the day can also b...

“Never let a stumble in the road be the end of your journey.” – unknown

Will you be part of the majority that gives up on your resolutions or the minority that succeeds? I want you to succeed! Which is why these last couple weeks, I’ve given you some tips to succeed at making your New Year’s Resolutions a reality this year.

But let’s face it, even though it sounds simple in theory, it can be tough because there are so many things that can trip you up and keep you from staying the course. That point is proven when you consider that statistics show less than 10% of the people who set resolutions actually keep them.

So today, I want to conquer some of the most common pitfalls that can sabotage your success and keep you from sticking with your resolutions.

1. Too Many Resolutions – Trying to make too many changes all at once is a recipe for disaster. You are more prone to get overwhelmed and give up. Pick the one transformation that is most important to you and start there. If you s
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“Success is the sum of small efforts repeated day in and day out." ~Robert Collier

Let’s face it, success does not happen overnight. Ask anyone who has been called an “overnight success” and they will tell you that they’ve spent years, working at it, day in and day out, to make it big.

So why would anyone think that they are going to make a New Year’s resolution to change and then poof – overnight, they are changed? It’s not quite that easy… and thinking that way can set you up for disappointment. (That’s actually one of the many reasons people give up on their resolutions. – More on that next week!)

But before you get discouraged, there is good news. Because although it might not be quite that easy, it can be as simple as making small efforts on a daily basis. One of the most important keys to creating change successfully in your life is taking decisive, consistent action. But it does not have to be monumental action. As a matter of fact, there is rarely one giant step that doe...

“New Year’s Day is only the beginning… never forget the power in what you do with the other 364 days of the year. In each and every one of those days, you have the opportunity to create greatness, however big or small.”  ~ Michelle Weimer

The new year has arrived and although nothing magically changed at the stroke of midnight on New Year’s Eve, there is still a sense of hope that the new year always brings with it. A chance to hit the reset button and start with a clean slate.

So if last year left you disappointed at all, whether it was disappointment because the year didn’t go as planned or disappointment in yourself because you didn’t handle the year as well as you would have liked to, this is your time to hit that reset button and start anew. Because it stinks to feel disappointment. And even worse, is the sting of regret. We might not be able to control or change everything that is occurring in our world, but we can most certainly make positive changes to our lives. And in ...

“I can’t tell you the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone.”  – Ed Sheeran

Do you often find yourself doing everything for others at the expense of yourself? Or perhaps you have a difficult time saying no to other people’s demands or requests. So much so that you'd rather twist yourself into a pretzel than say no to them. And then there's the worry and anxiety which stems from a fear about what others will think or if they'll be happy with you. If you can relate, then it could be that you suffer from the disease to please...

I have worked with many clients throughout the years who admittedly knew that they were people pleasers. It's often what draws them to working with a coach. They feel burnt out and trapped into what I like to call, “Superwoman Syndrome”. (Note: Not all who suffer from Superwoman Syndrome are People Pleasers, but all People Pleasers also suffer from Superwoman Syndrome - more on that next week.)

Anyway, I was doing a little rese...

“My Definition of Success: When your core values and self-concept are in harmony with your daily actions and behaviors.” ~ John Spence

Think about your greatest successes in life and what you value most. Odds are, if you are truly happy then your values and successes will be aligned. Why? Because what you focus on will be where you put your energy. Which is great if you can stay focused on what you value and believe in most. But sometimes, we don’t always live in congruence with what we value most and that is when things go astray. Because when you don’t live in congruence with what you value, your level of happiness can never be where you want it to be. And when you don’t stay focused on what’s most important to you, you’re likely to wake up one morning and realize that everything you’ve been working for is nothing that you really want. Or that will fill the void that you feel.

Reflecting back on my life as I celebrated my birthday last week... I know that my greatest successes ...