Masterful Mindsets

“Nothing changes, until you change. Everything changes, once you change.” ~Julian Lennon

Earlier this week was Groundhog Day here in the US… the day when we wait to see if a groundhog will see his shadow or not and then predict how much longer winter will last, as a result of the outcome. Kind of a zany (and not very accurate) event, but one that is rooted in tradition. As a matter of fact, Punxsutawney Phil has been giving his annual forecast in Pennsylvania since 1887.

This quirky tradition also became the setting for a movie back in the early 90’s called Groundhog Day. Where the main character, played by Bill Murray, gets stuck reliving the same day (Groundhog Day) over and over until he can get it right. After resisting his situation for some time, he eventually changes his attitude and then starts to make changes in his actions each day so that he can change the outcome of the day and eventually get what he wants.  

Do you ever get the feeling that every day is Groundhog Da...

“Flourishing goes beyond happiness, or satisfaction with life. True, people who flourish are happy. But that’s not the half of it. Beyond feeling good, they’re also doing good-adding value to the world.” ~ Barbara Fredrickson

As I shared with you last week, each year around my birthday I take time to reflect on my life. And again, this year was no different. I journaled and reflected on those three questions that one of my mentors, Brendon Burchard always asks, "Did I Live? Did I Love? Did I Matter?"

But then, I decided to move from reflection of the past year to asking a few questions of myself in a future focused manner. And this is where I embraced the ideas from another mentor of mine, Brian Johnson.

Brian is the founder and CEO of Heroic Public Benefit Company. And I had an opportunity this fall to spend several days with Brian, his wife Alexandra, his right-hand man Michael, and an amazing group of other Heroic people.

You see, Brian has a mission. His mission is to help ...

“It’s your road, and yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you.” ~ Rumi

Have you ever found yourself enviously comparing yourself to others or wishing you had someone else’s life instead of focusing on your own life’s path? When you try to follow someone else’s path, it can be uncomfortable and frustrating. Why? Because you are your own person. Every experience you have is uniquely yours because you are unique. Sure, you can model after how others do things, you certainly don’t have to reinvent the wheel but trying to fit a square peg in a round hole will surely only end in disappointment for you. True happiness comes when you free yourself to be yourself. And you find your true power when you start taking actions to move yourself along your own path.

So, do what fits you… do things your way, with your own twist. March to the beat of your own drum, listen to the rhythm of your own heart and know what you desire most - then start walking your road to...

“You can’t move on to your next destination if you don’t get unstuck from where you are.”

I was speaking with a fellow coach recently who’d asked me what I’d been up to. I told her we’d gotten our youngest daughter off to college and then filled her in on all the details of what’d been going on in business and how busy we’d been. Then I said, “But I’ve been super tired lately and feeling like I’m stuck on some projects that I just can’t get clarity or motivation on.” With which she proceeded to ask me, “Have you given yourself permission to grieve?”

My initial reaction was, to wonder what she was getting at and what that could possibly have to do with my stuckness. I thought, “I shouldn’t be grieving. I don’t have any reason to grieve.” After all, isn’t grief about death and loss? Sure, maybe not always a loss of life; if you’ve ever heard me speak on “The Death of a Dream” then you know that we can also grieve the loss or letting go of an unfulfilled dream for the future, a los...

"The quality of your life is directly related to the quality of your thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors." ~Michelle Weimer

Something I know I have learned in my lifetime is that life can be uncertain, unpredictable, and out of our complete control at times. So, although I certainly wouldn’t try to predict where the next step of life might take me, I do believe that regardless of any external circumstances, your quality of life can be different, if you commit to shifting what you can control, which are your thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors.

So with this weekend being the first day of autumn, a time when everything is changing – the weather, the leaves, our clothes, and our activities – let’s also use this time of year to change our thoughts, our beliefs, and our behaviors. After all, the quality of your life is directly related to the quality of your thoughts, beliefs and behaviors so just as fall is a time when nature changes and lets go of the old in order to rest and prepare for ...

“Life is a matter of choices, and every choice you make makes you.”  ~John C. Maxwell

Have you seen those quick quizzes on social media? (If you follow me on Instagram, you’ve probably seen them on my story periodically.) They list a bunch of things and then ask you if you’d choose this or that. It’s usually something fun and cute like “Coffee or Tea”, “Mountains or Beach” – but what if there was a this or that quiz that required you to dig a little deeper for the answers?

Over the last few weeks, I’ve been asking you to choose between Courage or Comfort, Hope or Fear, and Stuck or Striving. How’s that for a this or that quiz? When you really think about the choices you are making in your life, do you like what you are choosing? I get it, it’s not as fun as choosing “Cake or Pie” but its choices like these that can truly transform your life.

So, let me ask you, what choices have you been making lately that are dictating the outcomes of your life? And maybe more importantly, are ...

“Comfort is the enemy of progress.” ~ PT Barnum

I was in a yoga class recently and the instructor asked us to ponder the question, “Will you choose courage or comfort today?” She left it open ended… and since it was the beginning of the class, it would be easy to assume she was just talking about our physical effort for the class. But of course, you know me… I took it much farther than that. Because the truth is, you could literally ask that question for every instance, decision or action in your life.

As class continued, my thoughts went inward, and I had an aha moment that led to a shift for me, which reignited my desire and passion for progress. So, I wanted to share it with you, just in case you need a little nudge to push you out of your comfort zone too.   

Now first, let me just say that being comfortable isn’t always a bad thing. We as humans are usually striving for comfort in some way. But it’s when being comfortable gets uncomfortable that we must recognize we are stu...

“The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you aren’t going to stay stuck where you are.” ~Unknown

I often work with people who come to me because they feel very stuck in their lives. They either feel they have no choice about changing their current circumstances or they feel that despite their actions, nothing is changing.

Can you relate to either of these scenarios?

My guess is, that you can! Why? Well because at some point or another, I think we can ALL relate to feeling stuck. But the good news is, there is a way you can move from feeling stuck to striving! 

So first, the simple truth of feeling you have no choice is this… you ALWAYS have a choice. Even if it doesn’t feel that way. Now I get it, sometimes you might feel stuck because the choice is hard. Or maybe you have made a choice to stay stuck because the benefit in some way, outweighed the consequences. Or staying stuck where you were felt “less hard” than striving to make a change.

No one can judge ...

“Being able to selectively forget about the things in your life that don’t serve you might just be the most freeing feeling in the world.”

I was recently coaching a client through a session on defining her ideal identity and it reminded me of an old show I watched years ago. It was about a woman who had amnesia and was trying to figure out who she really was. As she began to rediscover herself, what she found was that she didn’t really like who she had been. So, she decided that if she was going to have to relearn who she was, she might as well learn to be who she really wanted to be. She chose to redefine herself, create new beliefs and make some changes that of course, lead to her becoming a better, happier and more successful person then she had ever been.    

I still remember thinking, as I sat there watching the show, that in a way she was kind of lucky. Don’t get me wrong, there would be many downfalls to having amnesia, like not knowing any of your friends or family. But woul...

“Do something every day that scares you.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

When was the last time you tried something new for the first time? I posed this question to my Tuff Chicks Group recently because I think it is important to try new things, be open to change, challenge yourself and of course, as the featured quote says, do something that scares you!  

I was speaking with my own coach recently (Yes, coaches have coaches – the process works! So why wouldn’t we?!?!) and was asked to rank how much I feel I challenge myself and to name something I’ve done lately that has pushed me out of my comfort zone. It was kind of interesting because at first I was being really hard on myself and then I began to think of several occasions recently when I’d stepped out of my comfort zone to take a risk, learn something new and challenge myself big time with a huge project. Doing the exercise made me feel really proud, because stepping out of my comfort zone is something that I try to challenge myself to...