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Masterful Mindsets

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Create Your Own Luck

"I’m a great believer in luck, I find the harder I work, the more I have of it.”   ~ Thomas Jefferson

What are your beliefs around luck? Do you believe that having good luck is out of your control and only the lucky ones can really have a life they love? Or do you believe that you are in complete control and that your beliefs, attitude, and actions determine the kind of luck you have?

My daughters were both highly competitive athletes. For years you could usually find me at a field or court, watching them play soccer or basketball, year around. As a matter of fact, my youngest daughter is in her first year playing college soccer, so I am still at games all the time.

And like most parents, I would always have a few pre-game words for them that almost always include these three phrases, “Play Hard! Have Fun! And Good Luck!”

So with St. Patrick’s Day being earlier this week, I thought it would be fun to discuss the concept of “luck” for this week’s Masterful Mindset. I mean, what ...

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I Love You So Much It Hurts

“I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love.” - Mother Teresa

I’ve been a bit nostalgic lately for some reason, revisiting many relics from my childhood. First, telling you about the book, “Love Is” and now, I want to share another memory…

I had a little plastic figurine, that had a sickly-looking person on it with the caption that read, “I love you so much it hurts.” Truth be known, I think it belonged to my big brother or sister and they probably got it from a high school sweetheart, but none the less, for some reason, I really liked that little figurine. It was meant to be funny, whimsical, and cute. (Which it was!) And although I didn’t understand that feeling then, I have to say that in my lifetime, I’ve actually experienced that feeling on many occasions...

With my husband, when I’m away from him. With my girls, when I watch every bittersweet moment of their growth into independent young women. With my father and my be...

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The Mother of All Sabotaging Beliefs

“You are enough, you are so enough, it’s unbelievable how enough you are.” ~Sierra Boggess

Last week I shared three common negative thoughts that frequently emerge when someone is pushing outside their comfort zone, facing a challenge, or struggling in some way. But quite honestly, none of them would likely crop up if they weren’t rooted in the mother of all sabotaging beliefs.

What is that belief? Well think about it for a second and then read on…

The mother of all sabotaging beliefs is: “I am not good enough!”

Yep, if you dig deep into your negative thoughts, odds are high you will find most limiting beliefs and fears are rooted in the assumption that in some way, shape or form, you are not good enough to handle whatever it is you are facing.

Don’t believe me? Try this little exercise the next time you find negative thoughts popping up in your head… If you ask the question “why” after your thought, what would be your answer?

Now the initial answer might not sound exactly l...

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Three Common Sabotaging Thoughts

"The thoughts we think and the words we speak become the reality we live." ~Michelle Weimer 

As a high-performance coach, one of my main goals is to challenge my clients to step up to a higher level in their personal and professional lives. And while I know it’s possible for everyone, I also know that sometimes it isn’t easy. However, most of the time, what makes it difficult isn’t external circumstances. It’s internal nonsense that actually keeps us from reaching our goals.

So, as you look to perhaps challenge yourself to step up to another level in your life this year; whether with your health, career, family, relationships, spirituality, finances, or something else… be on the lookout for some variation of these three common sneaky little self-sabotaging thoughts that might be holding you back from successfully achieving your goals this year.  

It's going to be hard. (Yes, I know I just said sometimes it isn’t easy but if you start out thinking it'll be hard, you are more like...

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Progress Through The Art of Self-Compassion

"The best self-help must always begin with self-compassion." ~ Margie Warrell

Last month I confessed to you that I am a recovering perfectionist. And like so many of the people I work with who are high performers, we do tend to walk a fine line between having a desire to perform at a high level and trying to be perfect. But striving for progress rather than striving for perfection can actually free you to be your best self rather than getting paralyzed by the pressure of perfectionism.

It is my hope that after reading the article I wrote on this topic last month, you decided to make the shift with me. But, now what? Maybe you’ve tried and then found yourself back in old patterns if being hyper-critical of yourself, feeling like you must prove your worth, overachieving and striving to be perfect once again…  

If that’s true, then this article is for you because now it’s time to help yourself step into this new way of being, beginning with having self-compassion. Yes, as our quote...

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Self-Selective Amnesia

“Being able to selectively forget about the things in your life that don’t serve you might just be the most freeing feeling in the world.”

I was recently coaching a client through a session on defining her ideal identity and it reminded me of an old show I watched years ago. It was about a woman who had amnesia and was trying to figure out who she really was. As she began to rediscover herself, what she found was that she didn’t really like who she had been. So, she decided that if she was going to have to relearn who she was, she might as well learn to be who she really wanted to be. She chose to redefine herself, create new beliefs and make some changes that of course, lead to her becoming a better, happier and more successful person then she had ever been.    

I still remember thinking, as I sat there watching the show, that in a way she was kind of lucky. Don’t get me wrong, there would be many downfalls to having amnesia, like not knowing any of your friends or family. But woul...

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The Secret to Happiness and Freedom

“The secret of happiness is freedom... The secret of freedom is courage.” - Thucydides

Independence Day is one of the greatest American holidays, both for what we celebrate and how we celebrate it. I mean, who doesn't love a good barbecue, a festive parade and spectacular fireworks? But as our whole world knows, freedom is not something to be taken for granted. A few years ago COVID quickly taught us that lesson. And yet, I still encounter people who readily give their freedom away by being trapped within the walls of their own beliefs and fears.

What about you? Are you trapped by your own fears and limiting beliefs, or do you feel truly free to live your best life? I know one thing; our forefathers certainly didn't fight for our freedom so that we could be imprisoned by our own limitations. So do you have the courage to set yourself free?

Take some time this week and into the coming holiday weekend to reflect on why we celebrate. There are some in this world who only wish they ...

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Mistakes Happen

"We need to accept that we won't always make the right decisions, that we'll screw up royally sometimes - understanding that failure is not the opposite of success, it's part of success."  ~Arianna Huffington 

I absolutely love this week's quote because it stands as a reminder to me that failure is not a bad thing. And instead, a necessary part of growth and success. This has been a hard lesson for me to learn. You see, I grew up with a well-meaning father what told me all my life, "You can't afford to make mistakes." Needless to say, it entrenched a huge fear of failure in me that at times would literally paralyze me from taking action - questioning my every move and staying in limbo for fear that the decisions or actions I might take, just might be a mistake!

Maybe you can relate in some way…

What are your deep-seated beliefs about failure? Perhaps you were programmed with a similar message when you were growing up that has kept you from taking huge leaps in your life. Do you ...

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Write Your Own Agreements

“Just imagine becoming the way you used to be as a very young child, before you understood the meaning of any word, before opinions took over your mind. The real you is loving, joyful, and free. The real you is just like a flower, just like the wind, just like the ocean, just like the sun.” ~ Don Miguel Ruiz

We all grow up learning certain “agreements” through our family of origin. Don’t get me wrong, some are good virtues and values. But some, are not so good. They are the messages that create the limiting beliefs which can hold you captive from being your best true you.

Sadly, some people spend their entire lifetime trying to break free of them. As a matter of fact, I often spend quite a lot of time with my clients, helping them overcome and rewrite their old life story into something new and freeing. It's in rewriting that story and no longer allowing the agreements of your past to control you, that you are free to create a new future. Otherwise, you often end up just repeatin...

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Practical Guide to Personal Freedom

“You can only be you when you do your best. When you don’t do your best you are denying yourself the right to be you. That’s a seed that you should really nurture in your mind. You don’t need knowledge or great philosophical concepts. You don’t need the acceptance of others. You express your own divinity by being alive and by loving yourself and others.” ~ Don Miguel Ruiz

Have you ever wished you had a practical guide that could tell you how to live a life of personal freedom in just a few simple steps? Would you commit to following it if you knew it could be that simple? Good news! It can be…

There’s a reason Don Miguel Ruiz’s book, The Four Agreements, spent over 10 years on the New York Times Bestseller List and sold nearly 7 million copies… It’s an inspiring book with a phenomenal message that offers a practical guide to creating personal freedom. Who wouldn’t want that kind of transformative information that could literally give them the freedom and power to become whomever ...

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