Masterful Mindsets

“If we pause and breathe in and out, then we can have the experience of timeless presence, of the inexpressible wisdom and goodness of our own minds. We can look at the world with fresh eyes and hear things with fresh ears.” ~Pema Chodron

Let’s face it… life is demanding! We live in a fast-paced world where busyness and overcommitment are rewarded. Where the drive to get ahead has us feeling like we are always behind. And where there are so many obligations and expectations required of us that our lives feel consumed by stress and overwhelm.

Which is why it’s essential to learn how to let go of tension and instead, live with intention if you really want to feel joyful and fulfilled in life. If you want a sense of peace and contentment in your outer world, you’ve got to begin with your own self-care.

Whether it be an intentional act of caring for our mental, emotional, or physical health, practicing self-care is not a luxury, it’s a necessity. And yet, when we start to get busy, ...

“Some of the greatest battles will be fought within the silent chambers of your own soul.” ~Ezra Taft Benson

I was speaking with a client recently about an internal struggle she was having with her thoughts and emotions around a situation she’s dealing with right now. She is a caring and giving woman to others but never that kind to herself. And of course, as we all know, when frustration or fear are involved, our thoughts can become our own worst enemy. Can you relate? I know I sure can. 

Anyway, as we talked through her coaching session it reminded me of the old parable of the two wolves. I asked her if she’d ever heard the story and she had not. I did my best to tell it from my memory. (It’s been about 20 years since I’d heard it.) Then told her I’d find the story and send it to her. To which I went to my old trusty friend Google to search for it.

And sure enough, I found it right away. But as with any good Google search, I was soon sucked into the vortex of the search and diggin...

“Nothing changes, until you change. Everything changes, once you change.” ~Julian Lennon

Earlier this week was Groundhog Day here in the US… the day when we wait to see if a groundhog will see his shadow or not and then predict how much longer winter will last, as a result of the outcome. Kind of a zany (and not very accurate) event, but one that is rooted in tradition. As a matter of fact, Punxsutawney Phil has been giving his annual forecast in Pennsylvania since 1887.

This quirky tradition also became the setting for a movie back in the early 90’s called Groundhog Day. Where the main character, played by Bill Murray, gets stuck reliving the same day (Groundhog Day) over and over until he can get it right. After resisting his situation for some time, he eventually changes his attitude and then starts to make changes in his actions each day so that he can change the outcome of the day and eventually get what he wants.  

Do you ever get the feeling that every day is Groundhog Da...

"Embrace your grief. For there, your soul will grow."   ~Carl Jung

The holidays aren’t always “the most wonderful time of the year” for everyone. As a matter of fact, this time of year can be a very difficult time for many. Especially if you are grieving from a loss, struggling financially, dealing with an illness, coping with depression, or feeling alone and isolated. 

The holidays can significantly increase sadness and grief, amplify emotional wounds and even escalate to serious depression. If you have experienced a loss (of any kind) recently, it can be an especially difficult time.

So how do you survive the holidays if you are hurting?

Grief and depression are natural when you are experiencing a loss in your life. For some, loss isn't just the death of a loved one, but can be the death of a dream, a relationship or even a job. Just know that grief and depression have many causes and take on many faces. You don't have to label it - if you are feeling it, you are feeling it. ...

"Sometimes it’s okay if the only thing you did today was breathe." ~Yumi Sakugawa

The holidays can be emotional for many people, especially if you’re going through a difficult time. We each fight our own unseen battles everyday no matter how big or small, and the holidays can bring about a lot of additional stress which in turn can cause emotions to escalate.

Whether you are grieving the loss of a loved one or struggling through another hardship like a broken relationship, a lack of direction, a failed business, an illness, a family quarrel or even grieving the dreams for your future hopes that did not come to pass this year, I want you to know that’s it’s okay to honor your grief and sadness. But I don’t want you to get stuck in it.

So today, just breathe... as I share some caring tips for coping with grief, depression or other strong negative emotions throughout the holidays this year.

If you are struggling this holiday season for any reason, please read on and feel free to s...

"Don't call the world dirty because you forgot to clean your glasses."  – Aaron Hill

Last week I talked about the importance of having clarity and focus when you’re setting goals and striving for success (no matter what area of your life you want it in). So this week I'm giving you Clarity and Focus Part 2…

Let's refer back to my example of wearing glasses – last week I told you that for a long time I fought the fact that I needed glasses to see clearly. But once I started wearing them, I realized how much easier it made everything.

Admittedly, I still try at times to get by without them. But inevitably, when I don’t have the clarity and focus that they provide, it always makes whatever I’m doing difficult.

But what happens when you have your “glasses” on and you still don’t have clarity and focus?

Recently, I was trying to do something and my focus was blurred. My first thought was, “What the hell?” I mean, I had my glasses on, so why did I not have clarity and focus? Then I ...

"Focus. Otherwise you will find life becomes a blur."  – Anonymous

If you wear glasses, then you know how much easier life is when you have them on. Why? Because you have clarity and focus. Likewise, when you have clarity and focus about life, it makes having a happy, successful life much easier too.

But I get it, life happens, you get busy and before you know it, life becomes a blur. With the new year beginning, it can be easy to scratch your head and wonder where the last year (or ten years) went. And then your vision for your desired future can become a struggle to see, especially if you have a difficult time staying focused on taking decisive actions toward achieving your goals. So if you're ready to admit that you might need some help getting clarity about the life you truly want to create and refocusing your efforts to get there so you can make this your best year ever, then it's time to commit to clarity and focus.

Now let me tell you a little secret... I don’t like to ad...

When you choose joy, you feel good and
When you feel good, you do good and
When you do good it reminds others of
what joy feels like, and it just might inspire
them to do the same.

We are all in full holiday mode – no matter what holiday it is that you celebrate - so today I want to share with you how to have a happy holiday. And how to survive the holidays in a positive way using five high performance (holiday) tips to help you bring the joy into your own life and to others.

Clarity - Be clear about what is most important to you this holiday season. And set your intention for how you want to show up. (i.e. bringing happiness and joy to others, being charitable, kind, etc.) It’s easy to be stressed out, overwhelmed, grumpy or angry during the holidays. But make a choice to get clear about how you want your holidays to be and how you want to show up this holiday season and then remind yourself of the words/intentions you choose throughout the holiday season so that you are showing...

“There are hidden blessings in every struggle. Be grateful for every blessing both hidden and apparent.” ~unknown

Years ago, I was speaking to a fellow coach who believed that hardships and tragedy are things we should embrace and even love. Now I will admit that I completely balked at that idea. I mean seriously, “love tragedy”? Nope. After all, I’ve experienced a lot of hardship and loss in my life and have worked with clients throughout the years who have endured tremendous struggle and unthinkable tragedy so I was not convinced that any of those things were something we could love.

But what I do believe, is that although we might not be able to get to the point of loving what has happened, we can in fact look for the gift in those experiences and love those gifts. Because hidden in every experience we have – the good and the bad – there is a gift given to us. And if we can identify the gifts and be grateful for them, then we can turn them into empowerment for a better future.

Th...

"Our character isn't defined by the battles we win or lose, but by the battles we dare to fight."  ~ Robert Beatty

What battles are you fighting in your life right now? Are you still fighting old battles from the past? Fighting with others? Or fighting an internal battle?

We all have battles we fight in our lives. Some are external - with other people. For example, a power struggle at work or a court battle with a spouse, over a divorce. (Even holding a grudge over a fight between siblings from the past can stir up new battles every time you interact with each other.)  

Some battles are not of our choosing - the battle for your life when facing a life threatening disease like cancer or maybe having to battle back from an injury, after having an accident. Sure we can choose whether or not to fight them. But we don't necessarily choose them to be in our lives.  

And then of course, there are the internal battles we fight. The battles with our ego and our self limiting beliefs ove...