Masterful Mindsets

“Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise.” ~ Victor Hugo

In the past few years, our world has become increasingly filled with worry and fear. However, I did not create this series solely because of the uncertainty and turmoil that has ensued since this decade began. Because the truth is, worry is always there, ready to pounce and leaving us feeling as if we can’t possibly breathe from the weight of the worry in our hearts. We may never be completely exempt from worry. But we also must remember that more times than not, worry lies. (So, if you missed any of the series thus far, feel free to click on each lie below to catch up.)

As a refresher, the three common lies worry tells us that I’ve been examining in this series are:

1. The worst is going to happen.
2. You can’t handle it.
3. This will last forever.

Moving forward, today I am continuing our series on the three big lies that worry tells us, where those lies often come from and most importantly, how to overcome t...

“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows. It empties today of its strength.” ~ Corrie ten Boom

Today, I am continuing our series on the lies that worry tells us, where those lies often come from and most importantly, how to overcome them so you can have courage to step boldly into your future.

Three of the most common lies are:

1. The worst is going to happen.
2. You can’t handle it.
3. This will last forever.

If you missed part one, of this series, where I discussed Lie #1, you can CLICK HERE to read it.

Let’s take the second lie now, “You can’t handle it.” This worry feeds off of the fear that the process of doing something will be painful or too difficult in some way. It often stems from believing that we are not good enough, smart enough, capable enough, strong enough -whatever enough. That is a lie! But I'm here to tell you the truth...

Without me even knowing you – I believe you can handle it! Why, because as humans, we are resilient. We are stronger, smarter and – MO...

"There is only one cause of unhappiness; the false beliefs you have in your head, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to you to question them." ~ Anthony de Mello

I once heard someone say that worry tells lies. And I have no doubt that's true. Heck, I've experienced it myself and I've seen it happen with others on countless occasions. In particularly, worry tends to tell 3 HUGE lies:

1. The worst is going to happen.
2. You can’t handle it.
3. This will last forever.

Think about it, when you worry, what are you worrying about? What is your inner voice repeating over and over? Sure, it might not be worded exactly like the statements above but if you break down the chatter going on in your head, I’d be willing to bet that most of the time, it would be a version of these three beliefs at the core. And when these deep underlying beliefs bubble up, they can not only bring in worry and fear but also create a lot of unnecessary anxiety and stress.

So how do you h...

"When life seems hard, the courageous do not lie down and accept defeat; instead, they are all the more determined to struggle for a better future."   ~Queen Elizabeth II 

How do you handle difficulty and defeat? If you have a growth mindset, it’s likely that you see it as nothing more than a roadblock on your path to success or a learning opportunity as you keep pushing forward toward your dreams. However, if you have a fixed mindset, then you may see it as a reason to quit and give in to the seemingly paralyzing effects of failure.

In addition to your mindset though, a lot can also be learned about a person's character if you observe them during difficult times. They will show you their victim side or their victor side. They will show you their pessimism or their optimism. Their kindness or their bitterness... And as the quote says, those who are courageous will show that they are strong and courageous, in their actions and determination. While all too often, those who are afra...

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”  – Lucille Ball

Most of the people I work with are heart-centered, service-oriented, high-performers and yet, extremely hard on themselves. They are quick to focus on the love they have in relationships with others but equally as easily, overlook the relationship they have with themselves. Sound familiar?

The problem is... if you're someone who wants to be your best and give the best of yourself to others, you’ve got to have a loving relationship with yourself or you will always hit a limit that you can’t get past. 

As the saying goes: If you want to say "I love you", you must start with "I".

One of the many areas I coach people on is having the confidence and courage to take risks and strive for success in all areas of their lives. And the thing I know for sure, is anytime you are pushing out of your comfort zone, you will struggle with fear and doubt...

"Don't call the world dirty because you forgot to clean your glasses."  – Aaron Hill

Last week I talked about the importance of having clarity and focus when you’re setting goals and striving for success (no matter what area of your life you want it in). So this week I'm giving you Clarity and Focus Part 2…

Let's refer back to my example of wearing glasses – last week I told you that for a long time I fought the fact that I needed glasses to see clearly. But once I started wearing them, I realized how much easier it made everything.

Admittedly, I still try at times to get by without them. But inevitably, when I don’t have the clarity and focus that they provide, it always makes whatever I’m doing difficult.

But what happens when you have your “glasses” on and you still don’t have clarity and focus?

Recently, I was trying to do something and my focus was blurred. My first thought was, “What the hell?” I mean, I had my glasses on, so why did I not have clarity and focus? Then I ...

"Focus. Otherwise you will find life becomes a blur."  – Anonymous

If you wear glasses, then you know how much easier life is when you have them on. Why? Because you have clarity and focus. Likewise, when you have clarity and focus about life, it makes having a happy, successful life much easier too.

But I get it, life happens, you get busy and before you know it, life becomes a blur. With the new year beginning, it can be easy to scratch your head and wonder where the last year (or ten years) went. And then your vision for your desired future can become a struggle to see, especially if you have a difficult time staying focused on taking decisive actions toward achieving your goals. So if you're ready to admit that you might need some help getting clarity about the life you truly want to create and refocusing your efforts to get there so you can make this your best year ever, then it's time to commit to clarity and focus.

Now let me tell you a little secret... I don’t like to ad...

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” ~Dale Carnegie

Halloween is over but for many, the fears they experience every day are much more frightening. If you know that your fear often gets the better of you then let’s unmask those fears and see them for what they really are, so they can lose their power and stop holding you captive.

If you read last week’s post, then by now you’ve already started to make a list of your biggest fears. So in this post, we’re going to identify what’s really at the root of your fear. Because awareness is the first step to change so once you recognize the real fear, you can work on building courage to move beyond it.

With most people, it comes down to the four primary fears I’ll be sharing with you today. Let’s see if you can identify where these four common fears show up in your life…

Rejection - We all have a desire to belong, be a...

“Change can be scary, but you know what’s scarier? Allowing fear to stop you from growing, evolving, and progressing.” ~ Mandy Hale

Halloween is just around the corner so what better time to talk about fear than now? But this isn't about ghosts and goblins, this is about something so much scarier... The fears that keep you from living to your full potential and creating the life of your dreams!  

We all have fears. Even the most successful people in the world have fears but they also have great courage too. Those who perform at a high level are aware of their fears and instead of trying to become completely fearless, they actively anticipate and manage their fears so they can move beyond them. Which is how they are able to develop so much courage.

The more you can conquer your fear, the greater courage you can develop too. But first, it’s helpful to know what you’re really afraid of. So get out your journal and take a few moments to answer the questions below:

• What do you fea
...

"Our character isn't defined by the battles we win or lose, but by the battles we dare to fight."  ~ Robert Beatty

What battles are you fighting in your life right now? Are you still fighting old battles from the past? Fighting with others? Or fighting an internal battle?

We all have battles we fight in our lives. Some are external - with other people. For example, a power struggle at work or a court battle with a spouse, over a divorce. (Even holding a grudge over a fight between siblings from the past can stir up new battles every time you interact with each other.)  

Some battles are not of our choosing - the battle for your life when facing a life threatening disease like cancer or maybe having to battle back from an injury, after having an accident. Sure we can choose whether or not to fight them. But we don't necessarily choose them to be in our lives.  

And then of course, there are the internal battles we fight. The battles with our ego and our self limiting beliefs ove...