Masterful Mindsets

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”  – Lucille Ball

Most of the people I work with are heart-centered, service-oriented, high-performers and yet, extremely hard on themselves. They are quick to focus on the love they have in relationships with others but equally as easily, overlook the relationship they have with themselves. Sound familiar?

The problem is... if you're someone who wants to be your best and give the best of yourself to others, you’ve got to have a loving relationship with yourself or you will always hit a limit that you can’t get past. 

As the saying goes: If you want to say "I love you", you must start with "I".

One of the many areas I coach people on is having the confidence and courage to take risks and strive for success in all areas of their lives. And the thing I know for sure, is anytime you are pushing out of your comfort zone, you will struggle with fear and doubt...

“True success is a feeling of happiness and joy.”  ~ Michelle Weimer

If you were going to define success for yourself, how would you define it? It’s easy to get caught up in the idea that success is a certain dollar amount in your bank account, a seat at the top of the corporate ladder, a new car, beautiful home, fit body, perfect relationship, etc. You know, the storybook life that all too often gets portrayed through pictures on social media and in the movies. But what I think is even more important than “Instagram Glam” is the true feeling behind those images.

If you’ve ever gotten an email from me, you know I sign off, “Happiness and Success” all the time. There’s a reason for that… It’s because I wholeheartedly believe that they go together. See, in my opinion, it’s the way we feel about our lives that defines true success. You might have it all according to the external image, but if you don’t feel happiness inside, you have nothing that matters.

True success is a feeling...

"Don't call the world dirty because you forgot to clean your glasses."  – Aaron Hill

Last week I talked about the importance of having clarity and focus when you’re setting goals and striving for success (no matter what area of your life you want it in). So this week I'm giving you Clarity and Focus Part 2…

Let's refer back to my example of wearing glasses – last week I told you that for a long time I fought the fact that I needed glasses to see clearly. But once I started wearing them, I realized how much easier it made everything.

Admittedly, I still try at times to get by without them. But inevitably, when I don’t have the clarity and focus that they provide, it always makes whatever I’m doing difficult.

But what happens when you have your “glasses” on and you still don’t have clarity and focus?

Recently, I was trying to do something and my focus was blurred. My first thought was, “What the hell?” I mean, I had my glasses on, so why did I not have clarity and focus? Then I ...

"Focus. Otherwise you will find life becomes a blur."  – Anonymous

If you wear glasses, then you know how much easier life is when you have them on. Why? Because you have clarity and focus. Likewise, when you have clarity and focus about life, it makes having a happy, successful life much easier too.

But I get it, life happens, you get busy and before you know it, life becomes a blur. With the new year beginning, it can be easy to scratch your head and wonder where the last year (or ten years) went. And then your vision for your desired future can become a struggle to see, especially if you have a difficult time staying focused on taking decisive actions toward achieving your goals. So if you're ready to admit that you might need some help getting clarity about the life you truly want to create and refocusing your efforts to get there so you can make this your best year ever, then it's time to commit to clarity and focus.

Now let me tell you a little secret... I don’t like to ad...

“Resolutions require only words. Results take actions.”  ~ Tony Robbins

I have no doubt, you’ve probably notice that there’s always a lot of discussion about resolutions in January, then shortly after, the topic goes dormant and disappears until the next new year. My guess is, you may have even set down to write out your own resolutions this past week. Which is great, don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to bash resolutions, but I do want to make a couple of things very clear to help you actually succeed at them this year.

Often people will use the terms resolutions and goals interchangeably. And while they are similar, there are some distinct differences that I think it’s important to know when deciding to set resolutions or set goals. So today, I’m going to differentiate between the two for you and tell you why, although you can have a goal without a resolution, if you want a resolution to really stick, you must have goals.

The two biggest differences between resolutions and goal...

When you choose joy, you feel good and
When you feel good, you do good and
When you do good it reminds others of
what joy feels like, and it just might inspire
them to do the same.

We are all in full holiday mode – no matter what holiday it is that you celebrate - so today I want to share with you how to have a happy holiday. And how to survive the holidays in a positive way using five high performance (holiday) tips to help you bring the joy into your own life and to others.

Clarity - Be clear about what is most important to you this holiday season. And set your intention for how you want to show up. (i.e. bringing happiness and joy to others, being charitable, kind, etc.) It’s easy to be stressed out, overwhelmed, grumpy or angry during the holidays. But make a choice to get clear about how you want your holidays to be and how you want to show up this holiday season and then remind yourself of the words/intentions you choose throughout the holiday season so that you are showing...

“There are hidden blessings in every struggle. Be grateful for every blessing both hidden and apparent.” ~unknown

Years ago, I was speaking to a fellow coach who believed that hardships and tragedy are things we should embrace and even love. Now I will admit that I completely balked at that idea. I mean seriously, “love tragedy”? Nope. After all, I’ve experienced a lot of hardship and loss in my life and have worked with clients throughout the years who have endured tremendous struggle and unthinkable tragedy so I was not convinced that any of those things were something we could love.

But what I do believe, is that although we might not be able to get to the point of loving what has happened, we can in fact look for the gift in those experiences and love those gifts. Because hidden in every experience we have – the good and the bad – there is a gift given to us. And if we can identify the gifts and be grateful for them, then we can turn them into empowerment for a better future.

Th...

“Another day, another blessing and another chance at life. Take nothing for granted and think of every breath as a gift.”  ~ unknown

As you know, if you’ve been following along the past few weeks, I’ve been focusing this month’s posts on Gratitude. Gratitude is a powerful thing. So much so that it can actually boost your happiness by up to 25%. So today, I want to explore the power of focusing on the gifts and blessings that we often overlook so that instead, we can make certain we take time regularly to look at them through the lens of gratitude.  

It can be easy to take people, experiences, and things in our lives for granted. But to practice gratitude from a higher level of consciousness, we must not take things “for granted” but rather see them “as granted”. This small shift in language creates a powerful shift in mindset and moves us from an attitude of entitlement to humility. And even if we don’t like to admit it, an underlying sense of entitlement is actually the #1 thing...

“Let us be thankful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” ~Marcel Proust

If you live in the US, odds are you’re preparing for the Thanksgiving holiday tomorrow. Which can mean many different things for people. For some it’s no more than an excuse to eat and drink too much. Or a much-needed day off from work. But for most people, it’s a day to get together with family and friends to remember what we are most thankful for. And if you’re lucky, the two go together… the people you’re with are in fact what you are most thankful for. So, as we prepare for this day of thanksgiving… why not use this as a time for reflection and sharing with those we truly are grateful for.

Going back to the research I’ve been sharing with you over the last couple of weeks from Robert Emmons, who wrote the book Gratitude Works! I want to share another idea for how you can practice gratitude in a powerful way and in fact, share the gift of gratitude. ...

“It is not joy that makes us grateful; it is gratitude that makes us joyful.” ~David Steindl-Rast

Last week I gave you an interesting statistic on the power of gratitude… I shared that people who have a gratitude practice of writing down at least 5 things they are grateful for once a week can boost their happiness by as much as 25% in as little as 10 weeks. Which is a compelling statistic in and of itself. But today I want to share a few more facts with you about the power of gratitude. (Just in case a 25% increase in happiness isn’t enough to convince you that it’s worth it to have a gratitude practice.) 😉  

So Robert Emmons, who is one of the world’s leading researchers on the science of gratitude along with his colleague Mike McCollough were the first researchers to discover the profound benefits of gratitude through their studies.

What they found was that people who regularly cultivate gratitude “experience a multitude of psychological, physical, interpersonal, and spiritual...